When I was only 7 years old, in second grade, I was teased about my weight and my choices in clothes. No girls wanted to be my friend and guys called me ugly all the time.
What stuck with me was that one day, a boy who I had a crush on told me the only way I would loss my virginity is if I got raped.
I wonder how he would feel knowing that that is how it happened. That I lost my virginity against my will.
I caught my boyfriend cheating on me again. I knew it was stupid to stay with him, but we had been dating since my freshman year of high school, and we were going on five years, so it terrified me to leave him. Each time he cheated on me was for a different reason, so I simply asked, "What's your excuse this time?"
He looked at me with fury in his eyes and blurted out, "Well just look at you! You've let yourself go. You do not look the same as when I first met you. I know I don't look the same either, but I'm not as bad as you."
I was stunned. I was a 150 pound 15 year old girl when we met, and stood in front of him as a 180 pound woman.
I didn't even cry. I just excused myself from the room.
I don't know what possessed me to stay with him for another year. He never even apologized. The most he ever said was, "That was a bad choice of words."
After that night, I exercised constantly behind his back. To this day I'm a fitness freak, only because I'm scared to death of gaining weight and having another person fall out of love with me.
Once when I was in middle school, I was joking around with my dad and we were just having a grand ole time. Then I tried to climb on him, but he wouldn't let me. He said, "You're too fat to be doing this."
I immediately stopped and ran and locked myself in my room and just cried and cried. I could hear my mom yelling at him for being such a dick.
To this day I'm still conscious about my weight because of him, even though I'm a 130 lbs and 5'7" college girl.
I was having an extremely hard day with my depression. I was walking down the street when my friend's mom called and told me that he had commit suicide. I broke down in tears while people walked around me, whispering things, staring.
But one person - we'll call him Rick for the sake of anonymity - stopped, gave me a hug, and told me that everything I was going through would end okay, that the pain would pass.
He walked me home. I asked him to come in for some coffee, as a way of thanking him, since I had really needed that hug. He came in, and asked me if I was willing to tell him what had happened. I told about our friendship, all we'd been through together, and what had happened. I broke down in tears and he held me until I stopped crying. He told me about his mom, how she had committed suicide after his little sister died from the accident she and his mother were in. I listened to him like he did to me, we shared stories, memories, and secrets.
It's been 7 years now, and he's my best friend and my boyfriend. After I was told about my friend committing suicide, I had seriously considered it myself. But thanks to him, to that amazing man, I didn't. He showed me that there is still good in life, there's still hope, there's still something to live for.
My father struggled with depression for years, and used antidepressants for 14 years. One day, four years ago, he decided he didn't need to use them anymore, so he stopped taking them cold turkey. Immediately we noticed a change in his personality. He was mean, rude, and just all-in-all out of character.
A few weeks went by, and he got worse and worse. One night was just over the top. He picked a fight with my brother, my sister, my mom, and me. We all fought back, saying hurtful things back and forth. My father left the room and went into his bedroom.
He soon came back out, and with no expression on his face, and no light in his eyes, looked at every single person and said, "Remember what you said."
After he said that, he barricaded himself in his room, where he had a gun. He killed himself soon after.
Ever since I was little, I dreamed of going to college. Learning and knowledge have always intrigued me, and my parents never went to college. I was determined to be the first in our family.
I spent the entire summer of my junior year applying for scholarships and to universities all over the US. I received a letter back from my first choice college, saying that I had been accepted!!
I ran inside to tell my family. When I told my father the good news, he said, "It's not a hard college to get into."
My heart shattered. I had worked so hard to get into my first pick, and when I did, he wasn't even phased. That's the moment that really stuck with me.
"You talk too much. No one cares." - My aunt, when I was 8.
"Who sings this? How about you leave it to them?" - My father, when I was 11.
"Your hair doesn't matter. No one is going to be looking at it with those thunder thighs in the picture. You'd be pretty if you'd just stop eating." - Also my dad, when I was 13.
"No one will ever be as amazing as you are." - My husband, frequently.
When I was a sophomore I had a horrible, horrible breakup with a guy I dated for a little over a year. He ended up leaving me for the girl he had told me for months was "just a friend".
After he left, I tried to at least salvage my friendship with him since we had once been very close friends, only to get a reply from his new girlfriend telling me I was an "incessant piece of crap" and that, the universe would be better off if trash like me killed themselves.
This put me in a really dark place, and it just got worse after my emotional support (my dog I had since I was a toddler) died in my arms, and two puppies I adopted after her death died weeks after their adoption.
After that, I began to believe what she had told me. I began blaming myself for the deaths of my pets and began wishing I was just dead so no other creature would have to suffer my existence.
It took a long time and a lot of therapy before I was finally pulled out of the dark place her words had sent me to, but even to this day if something goes wrong her words echo in the back of my mind and linger like a shadow following me.
When I turned twelve years old, I overheard our our 45-year-old neighbor say to my dad, "I can't wait until she turns sixteen so I can fuck the shit out of her."
My neighbor didn't know that I heard him.
And my dad didn't know that I saw him punch our neighbor in the face.
When I was in 7th grade, I mistakenly thought I was supposed to dress up for career day. I didn't know any better. People made fun of me for it, telling me I was weird and stupid. They laughed at me and joked about me.
This was the moment in which I became extremely aware of myself. I started to get my entire self worth from other people's meaningless jokes, side comments, and attention.
I am now in 11th grade with social anxiety, and can't even talk to people I don't know or only sort of know without crying and hyperventilating. Those comments definitely stuck with me.
Has anyone ever made a fleeting comment about you that immediately became tattooed onto the front of your brain for all of eternity, impacting your self-perception and self-worth? Whether it was an offhand comment made by someone you love and respect or a fleeting declaration by someone you barely know, we share the moments that stick.
