When I was in middle school, I got bullied a lot for being on the heavy side.
On the first day of 8th grade, I was sitting by myself at lunch when a group of girls came up to me and told me I was too fat for food, and they threw my food away.
I was born with really dark hair and had not yet discovered the luxury of waxing or bleaching.
There was this one guy I had a crush on in middle school, and we would IM back and forth after school sometimes.
He randomly said to me one day, "You have a mustache. You should shave it."
I did. And to this day, it's still one of my biggest insecurities.
My mom has always had mental health issues. I've stopped her multiple times from committing suicide. I was always supportive and caring.
One day when I was around 13, I spilled my heart out to my mom. I told her everything I was feeling. I told her of incidents in the past that really took a toll on me. I told her things that happened to me that I was too ashamed to talk about, and how my world was just falling down around me.
I NEVER cry in front of people. But at that moment I did. I cried in front of my mom because I was at such a loss.
his time, for the first time, I was the one who needed support.
She didn't console me. She didn't kiss my booboos. She didn't pat me on the back and tell me everything would be okay.
She kind of rolled her eyes and said, "Welcome to depression. Welcome to this life. How do you think I feel? Now you know what it's like." And that was it.
I am now the COMPLETE opposite with my child.
Children don't ask to be here. You bring them here. The least you can do is show unconditional love.
When I was in 7th grade, a boy told me I had buck teeth.
I was already self-conscious of them, and this made it so much worse.
When I grow up, I will get my teeth shortened.
It wasn't that hurtful when my cousin told me I looked like a beached whale.
But when my mother added, "But a pretty beached whale," I broke down.
I always thought that a campus library was a place people go to study quietly. That's exactly what I was doing. I was sitting at a four person table with my math textbook and notebook in front of me, quickly and accurately working out and solving math equations. Three seats were unoccupied.
You saw me and said, "We can't sit next to her. She might be a Muslim."
I don't wear a hijab, but that doesn't make me any less Muslim than a woman who does. And, to clarify, I am actually half Muslim and half Hindu.
Regardless of those facts, so what if I'm Muslim?
Does my brown skin offend you?
Do my tattoos and long dark brown hair suggest something?
Why does me being a Muslim deter you from sharing a public space with me?
Why does me being Muslim bother you?
Does my lack of a hijab make you think that I am some radical form of Muslim?
I just wish to understand why my religion is an issue to you. I guess it just does not make any sense...especially because you never once said a word to me in your life, and because well...this is a library.
I'm doing math homework.
You probably want to do homework as well.
The table is not going to hurt you.
Neither will I, nor will my religion.
I've always loved my boyfriend more than he's loved me.
Last April, I asked if he ever wanted to marry me. We got in a big fight. He said "I don't love you enough" and "It'll only end in divorce."
I think about it every day. Every. Single. Day. It's like a little asterisk every time he says I love you.
I love you*
*but not enough.
I cry almost every night, thinking about how long I have.
I was raped last year by someone I trusted with my life.
After almost a year, we spoke again and decided to be on semi-decent terms since we had to see each other at college.
He expected us to go back to being close and talking and hanging out all the time. That wasn't happening.
We had a phone conversation once where I told him I had no trust regarding him. He got upset and said that I was wrong for not trusting him.
After arguing for a long time, he told me that since it has almost been over a year, "You should be over it by now."
That I should be over the fact that he raped me.
I will never be over my rape. It will always affect me. How dare he say that.
A few years ago I was in a very abusive relationship, both mentally and physically.
Looking back on it now, I had a lot going for myself. I was smart and driven and kind, but I was so insecure, and he saw that so he used it against me.
He would always tell me, "You're never going to find someone better than me."
He said it so many times I believed it to be true. Like, yeah I could move on. I could start over. But why? What for? What if the new guy is just as bad but if not worse? It's not like anyone better would want me anyways, right?
I held onto his words for years.
But now it's four years later, and I found someone better. And I'm happy.
What you're doing with this organization is worth more than any dollar amount or recognition. The simple fact that this exists restores my faith in humanity, because humans created this group. Humans recognizing that not everyone sees the potential and goodness in others. There are no words for how amazing this is. Don't ever stop. :)
Has anyone ever made a fleeting comment about you that immediately became tattooed onto the front of your brain for all of eternity, impacting your self-perception and self-worth? Whether it was an offhand comment made by someone you love and respect or a fleeting declaration by someone you barely know, we share the moments that stick.
